Mindset AMA: #5 Why Don’t I Do What I Should?
This Mindset Ask Me Anything series features commentary from Love People + Make Money’s Community Creative, Lynn Leusch. Thank you Lynn for taking the time to review the questions and answers and write helpful notes to go with the replays!!
I know that I could easily have been the one asking today’s Ask Me Anything (AMA) in our ongoing series because I have found myself too many times in the same situation.
This mindset question comes in two parts:
Q: Why don’t I do what I know I should be doing and how do I get myself to do them?
Yes! I have been known to have a project or action that needs attention, but for whatever reason, I choose to sit and wallow in the anxiousness of not getting it done. Why?
Thankfully, Kelly drops some powerful insights to help answer these questions.
Short And To The Point
So why don’t we do the things we know we should be doing? According to Kelly, we are getting a benefit from not doing it.
Whatever it is that you know you “should be” doing. That fact that you aren’t doing it, gives you a benefit. So, ask yourself “What am I gaining from NOT doing it?”
What? There’s a benefit of NOT doing what I’m supposed to or should be doing? Kelly clarifies what she means by sharing two possible scenarios.
Scenario One – Tina Twostep Is A Procrastinator
Tina Twostep sets a goal to create a podcast (course, summit, etc) and wants to achieve it by a certain date, but it doesn’t happen. So she resets the goal date and it still does not happen.
Kelly shares that Tina needs to ask herself questions to determine what the benefit is of not accomplishing the goal in the allotted time frame?
So, what’s the benefit of not accomplishing the project?
- Not being judged
- Not being found as not being good enough
- Still an in-progress thing = there’s an extreme benefit to having an “in-progress” project to work on.
- Why? It’s fun, It’s creative, It’s exciting AND it’s not judged or measured.
WOWZERS! This makes so much sense and for me is one of those A-Ha moments.
Scenario Two – Tina Twostep Is a Doer
In contrast to our first scenario, Tina jumps in and gets her project completed.
Once the project is published and shared with Tina’s community, Now it’s judgeable. People can actually watch, listen, and give her feedback. And that is scary and even terrifying to many.
This is powerful stuff from Kelly right here:
If you can relate to that situation at all and ask the question “Why Don’t I Do What I know I Should Be Doing And How Do I Get Myself To Do Them?” You’re delaying judgement. You’re delaying feedback. You’re holding on to the cozy warm, fun, creative “in-progress” stage of things.
Question one answered. Check!
Let’s explore the second part of the question…How do I get myself to do it?
How do I just get it done and make it judgeable?
Kelly, just tells it like it is. You’ve got to be willing to fail.
Create And Publish Using the TARL Method
Bob (The Teacher) Sparkins has a book titled Take Action, Revise Later that Kelly talks about in her AMA video. She points out that Bob says you’ve got to be willing to be judged. That’s how you make it happen.
Procrastination and sabotage may be related to you being terrified of feedback or being judged. You like not having anything finished.
If you are attached to getting good feedback, then you might NEVER stop procrastinating and sabotaging your project and never put it out there.
As I continue to learn about how my behaviors potentially limit my outcomes I find it fascinating that sometimes the answers to my problems are so simple.
There is so much “good stuff” that Kelly shares in her video reply to this question. This is a must-watch for new and seasoned marketers and solopreneurs.
P.S. Love leaning into a more positive mindset? Subscribe to Kelly’s Mindset Notes and get monthly cards and stickers in the mail