Future In-Laws Think I Should Get A Job

May 28

What follows has been submitted anonymously by a community member. Please DO add your thoughts and advice as a comment ❤

My Secret Frustration:

My fiancé’s parents dropped a bomb on us last night. They think I should quit my business as a VA and get a job with benefits before the wedding. It was a total sit-down and talk about it thing that took me completely by surprise.

His mom believes it’s too much pressure on one person to ‘be the one carrying all the responsibility and connects that to him having benefits and my having none.

I don’t make a big income. I have been ‘barely’ self-supporting for several years. I never felt comfortable committing to a health insurance premium and they know it.

My fiancé gets tongue-tied around his mom and didn’t go far towards defending me. They pushed us to agree to think about it and he basically said we would. He told me later he likes me working at home though.

I do not want to get a job! I want to use this as motivation to push myself to make more money. Any advice for sweetly declining their input?

-Marrying Into Other People’s Opinions

Helpful & Encouraging Responses From The Community:

Christina Lemmey of Multi-Media Content Solutions shares…

So long as your job makes YOU and your fiance happy, that’s all that matters.

As parents, I’m sure they’re worried about their son being pressured to provide for both of you, but again, it’s YOUR decision together, not there’s.

Could it be that they don’t fully understand what you do from home? My parents, husband, and kids all struggled with figuring out what I actually did on the computer all day for quite a while. I swear my kids thought I did nothing but play computer games. Maybe offer to give them a quick lesson in what you do and show how it’s valuable to you and your fiance.

Good luck!

Thoughts From Kelly

Not being married myself, I’ll steer clear of the thoughts I have about the way your fiance chickened out in the conversation ;)

From an entrepreneurial point of view, we think differently about income and risk than those who’ve held a job all their lives. They can’t imagine not knowing  what’s coming in from week to week.  You can acknowledge their concerns without buying into them for yourself.

I love that their questions are inspiring you to make your business more successful. For a true entrepreneur, push back like this is great fuel for the fire ❤

You can learn more about my coaching options here.

We all have secret frustrations and I invite you to share yours. Submit your anonymous question, comment or story here.


My Secret Frustration

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